A little of Vienna, a bit of Paris, somewhere it looks like your home town. And there are the Hungarians all around, whose language is so astonishingly recondite, that one can listen to it endlessly. Winter is mild here, goulash and paprikash are thick and rich, and life is unpretentious and touching.
1. First of all you should take refreshment. It is advisable to begin with goulash – a soup made of beef, potatoes and vegetables. A good goulash is so thick that a spoon is sure to stand straight up in it. After being over with goulash, you should get down to paprikash – a ragout made of beef with sour cream and pepper. Paprikash is fairly often served in a bread pot. If you find yourself without a company in Budapest, you will regret it bitterly while having the second forkful of paprikash already – a single person can’t cope with such portions. You should order your first glass of Tokay wine with grief and stop being sad for a while.
2. You should get rid of the dinner flab walking along the Danube and crossing it by one and all bridges. You are supposed to make sure quite rapidly that the Danube is blue only in songs, but in reality it is yellow-grey. You are advised to go ashore near Belgrade Quay and to order your second glass of Tokay wine in one of the local restaurants with the view of the Danube. Having drunk up the wine, you are supposed to daydream about the way you will stuff all free space in the suitcase with the small bottles with the inscription Tokaji Aszu 6 Puttonyos (the best Tokay wine), and having thrown a glimpse at water, you are to decide that grey is a new blue.
3. You should go on with the excursion around the bridges. When your legs become deadly tired on the sixth bridge, you are advised to jump down to Margit Island – a real insular park in the middle of the Danube, no fooling. The Hungarians say that love begins and ends on Margit Island, because the twosomes run to that very place in search of privacy. However there is not much privacy, especially at the weekend: the couples kiss under each tree; in addition, the sportsmen make circles; the teenagers ride the bicycles, the children run about shouting, and the tourists take pictures of all this. You are supposed to stare at freezing lovers out of the windows of the restaurant attached to chick Danubius Grand Hotel Margitsziget hotel sipping the same Tokay wine.
4. You ought to open your mouth at seeing a giant Neo-Gothic building of the Hungarian Parliament, - Westminster Abbey seems to be a modest hovel in comparison with it. You should shut your mouth and go to Vörösmarty Square. You are to seat yourself at the table by the window in “Gerbeaud” café, which is famous for its magnificent interior and sesquicentennial history. You are advised to order enough of cakes that are sweet to lusciousness. Washing them down with strong coffee, you are supposed to scrutinize the lively crowd, which consists of hurrying students and beginning saxophonists and portraitists who don’t hurry anywhere at all. Sensing a strange buzz in your legs, you shouldn’t become frightened: the café is situated exactly above the subway line. Having left the café, you will see a Hindu performing something belonging to Mozart on the bottles with water, if you are lucky.
5. As darkness begins to fall, you should walk down to the quay near Vigado Square and buy a promenade ship ticket. You are supposed to take a quick walk to the neighbouring restaurant ship and have a drink to hearten yourself waiting for the trip. You are advised to pay for smorgasbord in addition and to fortify yourself properly looking at vespertine Budapest, which is illuminated with violet, crimson, yellow and blue, on the promenade motor ship.
6. The next morning you should set off for a walk along Andrassi Avenue (2, 5 km), the longest street of the city. The avenue is really a very beautiful boulevard built up with costly quarters – two-, three-storeyed white-grey mansions. You are advised to reach the end of the boulevard and to go for a segway ride, which can be leased at the entrance to Varosligeti Park.
7. You should stroll through the park, which looks like untrodden forest in some areas, and then you are supposed to hang out in Szechenyi Bath, which is the largest one in Europe, by the way. There are 9 swimming pools, under the open sky and under the roof, with the temperature from 15 to 40°, and there are also steam rooms and saunas in this Neo-Baroque complex. One can rent a swimsuit in local hiring-out. Admittedly, you shouldn’t expect it to fit your body perfectly. You are supposed to crawl from one swimming pool into another sluggishly, to look at the blue sky, to catch snowflakes with your mouth, if you are lucky, and to feel sorrows leaving your soul and diseases leaving your body. You are advised to consolidate the healing effect by means of a small drinking glass of “Unikum”, the most terrible Hungarian tincture, in Anonymus restaurant on the ground floor of Vajdahunyad Castle.
8. Having become a fresh person, you should climb to the top of Castle Hill to the remnants of medieval Buda. You are advised to stroll about the paved streets, to look at Matthias Church, Royal Palace, Fisherman’s Bastion and to settle down in a tiny bar near the entrance to Buda Castle labyrinth. You are supposed to order sausages and beer. And only after that you should descend into the caves.
9. You are supposed to go to the central market. You ought to feel nostalgic looking at the sticks of salami, with which the market is hung like with Christmas decorations. You should examine the market of local goose liver. It is far from being worse than French foie gras and is manifold cheaper.
10. You should always be on the watch: the Hungarians quite often dupe and short-change for some reason, not from malice, of course, and in most cases not to their advantage. So if you manage to hungarianize yourself, as Ildiko, the Hungarian from Bradbury’s novel “Doctor Criminale”, advised her English friend, you will feel totally well in Budapest. On the second day you will understand, what “to hungarianize oneself” means. And then you will want to come back to this city.
A PIECE OF ADVICE.
It is more convenient to take a fixed-run taxi (minibusz), which will bring you to any place you need (Ft 2300), in order to get to the city from the airport. Pest is the best place to settle, and Buda is the best place to go for a walk. Having taken up your residence in picturesque Buda, you risk finding yourself far from restaurants, clubs, shops and other entertainments. You are advised to read Bradbury’s novel “Doctor Criminale” before the journey.
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